Today, June 3rd, the charge nurse, Jon, told me that they have changed Mom's Haldol dose to 'as needed.' They feel she has been doing so well that they are going to see if it would work well to just use when she cannot get out of her tears/wailing. They will observe closely and give it if necessary. There is also discussion about upping her Cymbalta, but a decision has not been made at this point. We hope that this change does not result in a relapse for this weekend when Mike, Ann, Mary and ? are visiting.
Questions Mom has asked in the last couple days:
1. Where did all the personal things from Charbonneau go?
Pat and I were both with her when she asked this. We explained that things were divided up amongst family because at that time she was not really doing well and not one person could store everything.
She would like some of her personal items back. When we asked her which - she could not tell us - but we think we should slowly return some things. She misses her jewelry... I think we will pick up a bookcase and maybe we could slowly fill it with some momentos.
2. She asked Pat who was paying for all this (the room at Riverview.) Pat told her that she was...that Dad had arranged a trust for her that will take care of her needs.
He told her that if she needed anything - she just needed to let us (any of us) know and we would get it for her...he explained that Bill is paying the bills with the Trust. ) Within a few minutes she gave Pat a list... a watch that she could read, glass holders, a couch, a new comforter. Pat commented that he may have unleashed a dragon! :)
3. Today during our car ride she asked where Dad's funeral was held. I told her that it was at the Church in Kennewick. I told her that she was there - but she didn't remember being there. I described the ceremony.. that Mike gave the eulogy, that she sat between Mike and Barb (hope that was right), that there was a military ceremony, etc. I told her that it was during the time when she was not doing well so she may not remember. I described the reception and the party that evening. I described the boards that Mary created.
She then said, "Well, I suppose no one saved any of the newspaper clippings." I told her that I am sure that we have copies and we will get her some if she wants. She then started crying and said something on the order of: It would help sombody to have with closure.
4. During the last three days she is a bit more anxious. Leaving is hard. She communicates that she doesn't know how to do anything, i.e., turn on the TV, make a phone call, call for someone. I am not sure she will be able to really do those things, but the more she bonds with the staff at Riverview, possibly some of this anxiety will lessen.
I find that having someone else there, i.e., getting her ready to go to bed, or helping her go to the bathroom, or taking her to an activity is the best time to leave as she is with someone during the transition. She will probably still cry/complain... but it is hard to just walk out and leave her alone.
This morning I was honored to compete in the 4th annual "Stroll and Roll" at Riverview Care Center. Much like Bloomsday, participants get a T-shirt at the end of the event and no one knows the color of the shirts ahead of time. Grandma and I were a little late getting started but we managed to complete the course.
As we strolled amongst the flowers and water features the lovely lady featured above serenaded us dressed in her sequined shirt.
The course was packed! Grandma did one of her reincarnations of Grandpa as she prodded me to "hurry up" and "don't hold up the line." We only had to go around the course three times to get a t-shirt and I was in no hurry as I sang to the music.
Here is Grandma picking out a t-shirt. She asked for a Large so that she could give the shirt to her boys.
After we got our t-shirts Grandma wanted to continue going around the course. She kept telling me that we were only on lap 2 and that I was counting 1/3 of a lap as 1. At first I thought there was some dementia kicking in but then I realized that this was her sly way of keeping me going round and round. I think we finished a grand total of 7 or 8 laps. As we went around one corner I saw some young maintenance guys shooting one another with squirt guns. I warned Grandma to watch out for these hooligans. But instead of shooting at us they gave Grandma the gun. She then proceeded to shoot every staff member and plant within her reach! Be careful the next time you visit Grandma - you may get soaked!
Grandma brought her watergun to our BBQ table and kept it safely loaded and on her lap. Her tablemates joked about how we would get lunch first because we were armed. Sure enough the very first three plates of BBQ came to Grandma and her tablemates!
After lunch we went back to her room and tidied everything up. There was a letter from Joshua that she had already read from the day before. I read the letter to her again and she was just delighted. I thought this was a positive sign that even little things like a letter can bring Grandma joy over and over. I wish I would have spent more time during the last seven years getting to know my Grandmother. I am now constantly surprised by the new things I am learning about her personality.
