Jim's recount of his Feb 10 Visit
Back to our favorite girl. She was doing some wailing when I got there and seemed focused on being sad, so I took her for a walk and helped her focus on sights and sounds around her. The littlest of whimpers required focusing on a new object or person. After a slow and tactical walk her mood improved tremendously and we had a nice visit. This was followed by her telling me her butt hurt from sitting too long. A simple request for a transfer to her bed relieved the pain. I changed her radio to some soft country music relaxed her even more and she slipped off into a quick nap. I always knew she was a country girl. This gave me an opportunity to run to Safeway for supplies. Some pop, beer (for Pat’s visit), M&Ms, nuts, an orange and olives for lunch, and a chocolate milk for mom. Upon return I was delighted to have been joined by Dick and birthday girl Jolene. Mom was awake and smiling. Jolene, what is your secret? Jolene took her to lunch which was followed by some enjoyable conversation. Lyn already shared the Queen story, which Mom really enjoyed. A great day and wonderful visit. On your next visit use the distraction technique to get her thinking about the beauty life has to offer. Don’t let a few tears get you down.
February 11th 2011 Announcement: Mom's the Queen of Everything!
Jimmy: Everything in the frig is fresh at Mom's place. Help yourself! She stopped crying when I took her for a walk and made her look at things. Also candy is in the night stand. Olives are tasty and from Safeway.
WEEK IN REVIEW... Jan 12th - 20th Winks and other Wonderful Things...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vld_gkpQz4
and this is a picture taken the same evening:
In other happenings, Mary is filling out papers for Hospice so Mom will be able to get some extra services, Barb and Ryan are visiting at least 5 times a week between them and Kirsten is getting there a couple more times. Barb has been so good at calling from Moms and this last week it has been pretty special as she has been more verbal or 'with it.' Barb mentioned that she happened to call Bill the night before he left and he said it was the best present he could ever had have... The messages left on her phone and the precious letters are so appreciated. Thank you all from Grandma!
Phone Conference with Dr. Dentler
The last few days have seen some great times... Barb called once and both myself and Pat talked to Mom separately and she somewhat conversed... I said, "Hello, Ann, How are you? I love you so much!" She responded with "I also smell really good." :) Barb and I both laughed...but it was so very nice to hear her talking! Tonight Kirsten called and Pat talked a bit but her responses were not really intelligible. She was a bit teary.
When I talked to Barb that day she said that Mom really has had some good times. She really responded to letters from Susie and Terry that Barb read to her. Susie and Terry both talked about memories of doing things with Grandma on the farm... Thank you so much for sending those letters!
Just fyi...Pat just booked a ticket to come home to visit Mom in later February...
GRANDMA USHERS IN THE NEW YEAR PEACEFULLY... and with her favorite bear...
"I checked on her for last rounds and this the way I found her....she loves that bear.." Greg
So this meant that right before midnight Grandma was sleeping peacefully even though she knew that many of her children and most of her grandchildren were out rollicking and partying to bring in the New Year. This is probably a first New Year where Grandma was not worrying about her family. Hopefully this will be a pattern - of Mom becoming more and more peaceful.
Barb and Kirsten and the Cerrillos have been keeping Mom company (and very well other Ericksons - ) She seems to be holding her own. We have a conference call with Dr. Dentler this coming week to discuss Hospice. From an earlier conversation he had with Barb, we are guessing he is saying that he does not think that she is eligible for services from Hospice at this time. We were hoping that we could access some of the visits to just help lessen the time she is alone. We will learn more this Wednesday and update all. God Bless and HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Hospice Update....
1. While Mom does not seem to be appropriate for bereavement counseling, they have college interns returning in January who they would like to set up to just spend time with Mom, i.e., maybe once a week for a few hours. Pat, Barb, and I all feel this is a great idea.
2. With permission they would like to talk to Dr. Dentler about having Mom access other Hospice services, in other words, to be a Hospice client. This would mean that other support staff, volunteers and some nursing staff would check in on Mom. If Dr. Dentler agrees then Hospice would also pay for certain medications. (Pat gave them permission to do contqact Dr. Dentler with this request.)
They said it was important to realize that this does not mean that Mom has six months or less to live... and, in fact, Dr. Dentler may not o.k. her being a Hospice client for that reason. They feel that Mom may be entering some of those last stages of life and know that more contact, less time being alone might help her avoid some of the tearfulness and increase her quality of life.\
just keeping you informed...
Videos embedded
These are the 2 videos Lyn posted earlier this week. I've just been helping figure out how to embed them so you don't have to click a separate link. Enjoy them again if you'd like.
RIVERVIEW ERICKSON GATHERING - PART 2 - Mom calls Mary by name...
This is the floral sleigh that John and Annette sent Mom. Her room is really looking 'Christmas-y' with the flowers, trees, cards, etc., that people have sent. We get to see Grandma's eyes and her sense of appreciation when things come in the mail... we just want you to know she appreciates it! PS: Look in the background to the right....it is a picture of Grandma and Grandpa dancing...
As I said before, while we were sad that the Cerrillos couldn't make it to the party, Dick, Jolene, Rachel, Lauren, Luke, Annie and Zach, Pat, myself, Kirsten, Michaelyn, Jim, Karen, Jason, Jarred, Barb, Ryan, Claire, Isabel, and our surprise guests, Mary and Paul, made it a very Merry Christmas group.
We also invited Petra, a tablemate of Mom's, to join us. And just to round out our group, another resident in the memory care area wandered in asking what was going on...and Karen let her know it was a party and helped her get a place to sit and somethng to drink. She joined us for almost the entire time. Her name was Eve, but we kept on calling her Wanda! (Callaway Garden memory..)
This is a picture of Zach, Annie and those two twins... I wonder which one is the evil twin??? (That was an Uncle Jimmie tease, I think...)
Sunday morning Kirsten joined Annie and Zach at the Simmons for some extra special French Toast that Barb fixed... it was 'OMG' good according to the chef... I think she was using a recipe from one of her best friends...or best admirer... or actually I think it was both. :) Pat and I at the last minute joined Mary and Paul for Mass at the Cathedral and then walked with them to see their room at the Hotel Lusso. Pic below is at the Davenport Hotel in front of their Christmas Tree.
I have this second hand...but when Mary and Paul went back to visit Mom on Sunday... Mom responded to Mary's "I Love you, Mom" with a "I love you, Mary." Mary said it made every mile of driving in the snow worth it... (Actually that statement was made before they left Spokane in a snowstorm so she might be revising that statement.)
God Bless to All and especially to Grandma!!!
RIVERVIEW CHRISTMAS GATHERING - PART 1 - Surprise Guests!
That said... we did have a great time even WITHOUT that fun-loving rowdy Cerrillo bunch. What really helped turn this into a gala affair was that MARY AND PAUL showed up and truly surprised all!!! I will maybe let them tell their saga of their trip over themselves...although Mary will allude to it in the video I will embed in this blog update. We just had a great time gathering, spending time with Mom, and, of course, eating. Here is a picture of some of the kids playing outside Grandma's room... wait - I mean here are some kids and Kirsten.... wait - I guess it really is just a picture of three kids. :)
Mom was awake for much of the day. She has really been more alert in the last couple of days than she has for the past month. She did get tired and slept and then we put her back into bed for a later afternoon nap, but when dinnertime came around, she was ready to get up and get going again.
Here are a couple videos of the party. DISCLAIMER: These are all uncut... and very, very, rough, non-professional.
(COPY AND PAST URL INTO YOUR BROWSER...)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSI-fpMILG0
DESCRIPTION: 1.5 min; people at the party...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8x-4hfQhqEk
DESCRIPTION: 30 seconds; grandma... and 'twins'
'Mike's card'.... and 'Janice defines the word "nurture" '
verse inside card:
You’ve given me the gift
Of sweet childhood memories.
You’ve given me the gift of dreams:
The ones you’ve made come true
And the ones I achieved myself
because of your encouragement.
But most important of all, you’ve always
Given me the gift of your love,
The most precious gift of all.
There’s no way I could possibly thank you enough
For these gifts and so many more.
I will always be so grateful,
And you will always have a special place in my life—
And in my heart.
JANICE AND GRANDMA and nurturing...
A 30 second video of Janice and Mom... (If the auto link does not show up... copy/paste this address into your browser: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWitfvTsTb4
Thursday, Dec 9th - Surprise at Grandma's
RIVERVIEW CHANGING MEDS...
DEC 8TH, WEDNESDAY
WEDNESDAY - Visiting in the afternoon Mom was sleepy but when awake she was aware. I brought an italian soda type drink with protein powder. I had them put whipped cream on it...and she sucked that down in a few minutes. It makes you feel good when you get something that you can see her enjoying. Amy, the swing nurse came in and we all talked for a long time...followed by a conversation in the hallway. Amy talked about how Ann has changed so much in the last few weeks...that she often no longer connects in any manner. No eye contact... not eating. Amy is one of my most favorite employees there...she is so loving yet very upfront and so knowledgeable. In the hallway we had a frank conversation about how Mom seems to be shutting down and Pat and I asked about what that might mean. While everyone is so different, Amy said the stages are usually pretty apparent and it could be months and months or even a few weeks. Pat and I are obviously concerned about our heading down to AZ...but she said Riverview would be working closely with Barb and we will be called if they feel she moves into the stage where we (all of us) would want to be here. And as usual I am sure I am echoing all of your prayers as I hope that Dad would just sneak in there one night and snatch her away to cuddle with him in heaven.
Here is a pic of Frank's birthday card....it looked like a normal card and asked the question, "How much do I love you?" and when you opened it it got gigantic and this puppy spreads out his arms. Mom really smiled...almost laughed! I will also add a pic of the christmas Tree that Huy and Kirsten brought for Christmas.. I am heading out now to meet Barb there - Barb is there everyday.. When we were talking about trying to find a time to meet...Barb said that she usually gets there around 7 am...so she is there when Mom wakes up....so Barb thinks Mom kind of thinks that Barb lives at Riverview :)
DEC 7TH, TUE
Mom's new wheelchair is much better for her. Without having to move her she can be moved from upright to pretty much any angle. Pat wanted to make sure everyone knew that if you are giving her something to drink...make sure that she is upright. He had a rather bad experience when he let her sip water while being too far back. Picture is of Sally, Mom and Pat.
DEC 5TH, 6TH, MOM'S BIRTHDAY!
You need to copy/paste into your browser: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3aEd06GyIck
MONDAY - MOM'S BIRTHDAY
It was so nice for Mom to receive cards and phone messages and phone conversations today on her birthday! Sometimes at this point I think maybe we get more excited than Mom... it gives us something to read to her or the chance to play messages. I so believe she is aware even when sometimes her eyes are closed and she does not seem to be here. Pat played the messages and while he was there Janice and Mary called...and Mom was able to respond to them...although Pat said she also fell asleep while both Mary and Janice were talking. :) Here is a picture of the most beautiful arrangement from the Cerrillos. My picture does not do it justice!
Saturday, Dec. 4 APPLE CUP!
The triazapam makes her calm and "happy" but sleepy. It sedates her. She thanked Ryan and I and the girls for coming yesterday noon and agreed that Dad would have called the Apple Cup attendees fools for sitting in the cold.
Time to go back in. A half hour of wailing at a time is all I can take.
LYN: Well yesterday we were like ships passing in the night.... Barb, you were there in the morning... I was there for the afternoon and Kirsten was there for dinner. I think I had relatively easy duty in that Mom just slept the entire 3 hours I was there. She just wouldn't wake up. It wasn't entirely easy as I have to admit Mom's snoring is most accurately not described as delicate and quiet. When I talked to Kirsten in the evening she actually got a couple "I love yous.' So I am glad that she is truly not sleeping all of the time. (Maybe she was feigning sleep because she realized I was there. :) I brought my computer and a book and it was actually pleasant being there. Even though she was sleeping I still talked with/at her... I hope that subconsciously she feels our presence. And yes, I think there is total agreement that the Apple Cup people are shy a few brain cells. Pat called me from the stadium and shared that he had sole heaters, patches of those heating pads pasted all over his body, hand warmers in his gloves...and he was STILL cold! Oh well, a Cougar fan is a Cougar fan...and rational thinking is not a requirement of belonging to that club.
Thursday, Dec. 1
Sunday, Nov 28 at Riverview...
link to video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IcoVhNaWHkM
Update from Pat on a very snowy evening...
This morning we awoke to a foot of new snow. I think we have had a little over two feet year to date. Pullman was getting heavier snow today so the Apple Cup may truly be a snow bowl. Lyn and I beginning to wonder whether the weather will curtail our Arizona plans.
We enjoyed a grateful Thanksgiving gathering with all of Lyn's sisters family at the Jones. Dee & Steve were gracious host and all 26 of us sat at one long table. Michaelyn's Key Lime (our AZ limes) pie was a hit as was Sue Pecan nut pie. David made rolls and loafs of especially delicious homemade bread.
Mom does not have much energy. She spends much of the time sleeping in her wheelchair. Thanksgiving morning she got upset and pulled the hair of one of the aides so they gave her a sedative. They said this was the first time she has ever acted that way. Partly because of the weather and her sedated state I made the decision not to take her out for Thanksgiving.
She eats very little. She got mad at me the other day saying "Don't feed me like a baby!" Mom will usually eat a few bites of fruit (peaches, pear, watermelon, cantaloupe) but the last couple of weeks virtually nothing of her entree, vegetables or starch. Yesterday she slept through most of my visit, but I did put my face close to her and said I love you Mom, and she responded "I love you too".
Because she is generally not communicative I have gotten in a routine of scratching her back, washing her face, holding her hands and helping her drink. She can no longer hold a glass by herself. We usually pray for a while, I will read her some scripture and then we just listen to music or some sporting event. They are putting her back in bed more often because she slouches down when she falls a sleep in her wheel chair.
She has had a runny nose for the past three days and has some kind of bronchial issue. She is coughing more often and sounds congested when she tries to talk.
Please call her and leave her some messages, I will replay them repeatedly until I am sure she is cognizant of your call. Continue to remember Mom in all your prayers - even when you are praying for your team to win.
Love to all - Pat
Thurs., Fri., Nov. 18th & 19th
Thursday - Lyn: Pat picked me up at the airport about 1:30 and we stopped by Mom's on the way home. She was in bed asleep when we got there - and looked great as Thursday, you know, is her hair appointment day. She woke up as we were getting situated and I think was surprised to see me. I brought a present for her (a Christmas Sweater...) and when she saw the package she really lit up....but fell asleep with it on her lap. When she woke up a bit later we opened up the outer wrapping...and then she started to open the tissue..but again fell asleep before finishing opening it. When we finally actually 'opened' it though, her face lit up. I think bringing even small little wrapped gifts might be a good thing - maybe it's like that inner child that we return to...(Who am I kidding? We all still like to open presents!) It was so good to see her after so long.
Napping with Mom...Sat, Nov. 13th
Mom Looked Great Today in Her Red Sweater...
When I complimented Mom about her sweater today, she said she liked sweaters and she would like to have a new sweater. That may have been the most coherent thought she has expressed in the past month. While she still tries to communicate, I generally cannot discern her thoughts or wants. It seems that increasingly she is not fully in the present and at times she may be hallucinating or experiencing a different reality. Today she thought I was going to take her somewhere - home - and was upset when I told her that since she could no longer stand, I could not longer take her out of Riverview. She then sobbed for the next hour. I put on a CD of Gospel music and she seemed to calm her some.
Mom does not seem to be anxious a lot - just lost. She does respond to simple things, a hug, kiss, back scratch, foot rub and smiles. Mom reminds me of Lyn's Dad, Joe, and his struggle with Alzheimer's.
We are planning to bring Mom out to our place for Thanksgiving, as we will have plenty of help with the Shipman men to get her in and out of the car. Maybe at Christmas we could do the same or perhaps have an Erickson family Christmas gathering at Riverview? Maybe the afternoon of the 22nd -23rd?
I would again encourage everyone to call and leave her some short and upbeat phone messages. We will play them for her. Love Pat
Update From Pat again....
Medical
John (Day Charge Nurse) advised me tonight that Dr. Dentler had ordered some changes in Mom’s medication. Effective today they have discontinued using the fentanol patch (for pain) as he thought it too sedating. They will give her a 2.5 mg of methadone daily for pain. They will also stop using Haldol in seven days as they have begun giving her 2.5 mg. of zyprexia for 4 days and then 2.5 mg b.i.d. p.o. ( 2x daily by mouth.) The zyprexia is a psychotropic drug that may help her with dementia /agitation /moods (sadness). They use zyprexia for agitation with psychosis, etc. They will also give her 20 mg b.i.d. p.o.(2x daily by mouth) of omeprazole (Prilosec) for acid reflux.
Social
Mom has had a good three days. Monday, when I got there, she was wearing a plastic apron as they had carved a dozen jack-o-lanterns. I am not sure what she did, but she had pumpkin seeds and pulp on her hands. Yesterday she was at bingo when I got there, but was basically just watching; however, I was there she did put a couple of chips on correct numbers all on her own. Both days she seemed generally happy-especially when Barb, Belle and Claire arrived. Today they had their monthly candlelight & wine dinner so I volunteered to stay for the prime rib. They had tablecloths, electric candles and linen napkins. I tried to coax mom to feed herself again and she did manage three bites but really showed no interest in eating. She ate another 3-4 bites that I fed her but essentially ate very little. I carried on a running conversation with Pietra (resident) and the staff and at least 6 times mom commented. When I spoke directly to her she mostly just smiled and nodded. The recreational therapist said she walked 15 feet today, which is the first time in over a week that she walked at all. Read her a letter from Frank yesterday and she tried to say something about his letter but I could not understand.
She really loves to have her back scratched, almost coos, so when you visit I would recommend that be the first and last thing you do when you're there.
Tomorrow I am joining Lyn in Peoria for 6 days. I think Spokane is going on week three of grey, drippy days. I don’t think I am going to miss that...
Love to all - Pat
Update From Pat...
Mom has been given Haldol a couple times a month these last two months. While Mom is more sedated / reticent on Haldol, at times the staff will use it if she does not respond to other intervention protocols when she is weepy. The PA asked whether we would like to consider counseling for her. I doubt such sessions would have any lasting benefit, but I don't really know.
They are watching her anemia, as she has been seemingly more tired of late. I told them about her Procrit. While she does receive an Iron supplement this may not be sufficient. They indicated a blood transfusion might be beneficial.
We have been taking her to Mass on Sundays. She enjoy getting out especially having a chocolate milk shake afterwards. We have taken her out to eat a few times, and most Sundays we try and bring her to our house after Mass. Last Sunday I think she slept 2 of the 3 hours she was there even though Michaelyn, Kirsten, Lyn and I were talking all around her. On Wednesdays at 3:00 mom attends a Catholic communion service downstairs in the chapel.
Mom may not remember who she visited/talked with from one day to the next. Sometimes she struggles understanding the 'future' - I will tell her that on the weekend we will go to Mass and before I leave she wants to know why I am not taking her to Mass now. At the care conference the RV staff suggested that instead of always trying to bring mom into our reality at times it may be easier to respond to hers. For example a while back she asked me "What Saint is that a picture of?" I had no idea what she was referring too, as I searched for what she was talking about. I said "What picture? I don't see any picture" I could just have said, "I don't know". "When will Dad get here?" "When he can, people are busy in heaven".
They are still providing restorative therapy 4-5 times a week. This involves mom practice standing up and holding on to a bar while she marches in place, walking with a walker and various arm exercises. She seems proud of what she can do - which isn't a lot, but we need to continue to encourage her to use what she has left. When I help her use the restroom or get into the car she can shuffle some to assist with the transfer, but she needs to be encouraged to 'stand up straight' & 'move your feet' or as I say 'dance with me mom'.
I have started taking her to visit other residents. While I do most of the talking, the resident seems to appreciate that we are 'visiting' and I think it keeps mom from being - feeling alone.
One week when at Bingo the other Ann, also a Catholic, was basically covering mom's cards I took over and put chips in her hand and told her when she had a number on a card. I only had to point out the card, not the number, and she was able to place the chip on the correct number albeit very slowly. One day she was making apple turnovers with six other residents but wasn't making much progress with the dough. They were all covered with flour and trying to share cooking-baking stories, but no one was very coherent. I put too much filling in mine so they became apple pizzas.
At the suggestion of Matt -dietician - I purchased a message phone for mom's room. For it to work, we had to set it to record after 4 rings. So, while you may not get mom when you call you can leave her a message. 509-482-8693 When you leave a message remember that she probably is there and can hear you. We will try to teach her how to access the replay by herself, but we can monitor the system and make sure she hears the messages and delete them as needed for space. We also thought it might be good for us to help her place calls to family so you can 'talk' to her directly. You very well may have to carry the conversations, but you may get a gem of mom to treasure.
Yesterday when visited her she was napping when I got there and when she awoke she slurred her speech a little. She asked me twice when would Dad be coming, but before I answered she said, "Oh he's gone".
If you send me an e-mail for her I will print it out in a larger font to make it easier for her to read.
Early October 2010
I only have pics of the Spokane Erickson's but many people have visited Grandma in the last month... Bill, Jennie and Ali, Dick and Family, the Cerrillos. Hazel Rettkowski and her daughter Susan stopped by one day. Too bad it wasn't a great day for Mom... Michaelyn and I visited a Farmer's Market one Saturday and picked up a bouqet of humungou dahlias. They were absolutely stunning and we brought them to Mom's place. We put some in a vase for her room and took one down to the nurses station for them to enjoy. The trip down was so cool for Mom as EVERYONE ooohhhhed and aaahhhhed over it and she was enjoying every single second. I don't have a pic of Mom and the flowers but here is Michaelyn with one...
September/October 2010 Beautiful Garden time...
Mary, Mom and soccer games...
Mary trekked over the mountains to spend a couple days with Mom and was also able to watch the Simmons Super Star Soccer Players. The video below is Mary greeting Mom...(you will quickly see I am not a stellar video taker...but it is nice to hear Mom. When Mary walked into the room, Mom literally 'lit up.' Wish I could have captured that...
The pic to the left is Mom, Mary and Claire in Kirsten's classroom. Mary, Barb, Mom, myself and the girls had a picnic lunch in Kirsten's classroom on Saturday and we all stayed and helped her prepare. Great time!
Tailgating...or wheelchairgating at the WSU/SMU Game!
What a great Saturday Game Day for Mom. Too bad the Cougars couldn't have won! Bill picked up Mom on his way up... Mom joined four of her sons and one grandchild to cheer on WSU. Well, actually she slept through much of the game waking only at times when the guys would yell. While I initially berated Pat for startling her awake...she was quick to say that she LIKED the goings on, and I truly believe she did enjoy hearing the familiar noise of family watching football. GO COUGS! (Ignore camera dates on pics...)
September 2010
This month included many visits by Barb and the girls... If I may quote Claire, who shared during one visit why she really loves coming to see Grandma: "It's because every room has a cuddly stuffed animal on wheels...and I love to hug them." One day Barb and the girls entertained Grandma by dancing outside the window....
Late August 2010
July 27th - Aug 10 - Catching Up
Mom is doing well, had a perm this week but is not that happy with it. It doesn’t seem quite as nice as her previous perms at Charbonneau and in Othello. Pat took her to Costco this last weekend and they picked up needed supplies for her room - chocolate clusters and beer. The Cerrillo group came in masse last week and Mom talked about it for days.
We took her to St. Peters for Mass this Sunday and for the first time she said this church seemed like a ‘Catholic’ Church. I don’t know what it is about Barb’s and our churches, but they just don’t seem to be ‘Catholic’ enough for Mom. After church we had lunch with her and then Bill and Jennie came in to spend the afternoon. I talked with her the next day about how blessed she is with so much family…and she sure knows it.
On Monday Kirsten arranged to show a movie in their ‘theater’ and while I didn’t really plan on staying for it… it was an old John Wayne movie 'North To Alaska,' and I ended up staying for almost the whole thing. They show movies in a smaller room with a huge screen and make homemade popcorn. It was really quite nice!
They have finished adjusting her wheelchair to better fit her and she continues her restorative therapy. Restorative therapy is ongoing and there is no added cost. Its purpose is to increase or at least maintain her quality of life. Mom has voiced her desire to be able to just get into bed to take a nap and get up on her own. We did ask about a pole by her bed – as she had at Charbonneau. Riverview is not able to install those because of structural reasons, but regardless, they said because of safety issues Grandma is not ready to transfer without an assist person at this time. They will continue to do what they can to help her be as mobile as she can… That’s all for now. I will try and go back to entering more frequent shorter entries…
July 26th - Ice Cream at Barbs
Unexpected Surprise
Last night I mentioned something about Grandpa and then I followed up with the question.
"Do you mind if we talk about Grandpa in front of you Grandma?" I inquired. She responded....."I love hearing about your Grandpa and it does him honor to remember him."
So at the lake this year if you find yourself holding back because you are worried it might upset Grandma - don't worry. She would love for us to share our memories of him at any time.
When I left her today I asked Grandma what she was going to do. She pulled out the daily activity sheet and talked about how she was going to go to the Coffee Social at 10, Lunch at 12, Bingo at 2, but she was not 100% sure about going to the Game Night at 6:30. Knowing Grandpa, he must be rolling over in his grave, exasperated in a loving way, at how he tried so hard to get Grandma to socialize at the Charb.
Last note on ice cream......Grandma did talk about buying all the Grandkids ice cream at the lake this year. I vote for Monday night.....partially because we did not plan on a dessert yet!
A few other notes....
Daisy is an absolutely amazing caretaker at Riverview. She showers Grandma with kisses and humor on a daily basis.
One of the employees is pregnant and Grandma grabbed her arm the other day and told her that she should name her baby "Andrew" as it was a good name. It was so cute!
P.S. She is reading and re-reading the letters that have been sent to her. I offered to read one and she shooed me off and told me that she may be slow but she can still read. Still a bit unsure I curled her hair and sure enough.....she read a three page letter bit by bit. It did take about 15 minutes but she seemed to enjoy every minute. I also saw a bookmark in her reading book! Her glasses come in on Wednesday and I plan to pick them up and take them to her. Ideally I would be able to take her to Costco and have them properly fitted. If anyone wants to help me take her to Costco in the next few days let me know. Otherwise I will just deliver them tomorrow and take her to Costco to have them fitted after the lake. Also, I don't have a Costco card so I would not be able to take her shopping inside the store if she requested to shop. And I think our shopaholic Grandma is back. Bill might have to reign in a little wild spending. joke/wink ;)
Post by Pat - Update on Mom's Eyes
Except for some stigmatism and creeping cataracts Mom had a positive eye exam. No glaucoma, no macular degeneration and no retinal detachment. Mom seemed opened to cataract surgery but it would 4-6 weeks after she makes a decision before they could do her first eye, another 4-6 weeks before the second and then 4-6 more for healing before they could fit with post cataract glasses. They advised us that Medicare would pay something for the surgery and the post surgery glasses. The D.O. said the cataract surgeon had a preoperative procedure that would enable mom to ‘see’ what her post cataract vision might be but I have not yet followed up with the surgeon to confirm.
Rather than wait 3-4 months for glasses, Frank and I took Mom to Costco and ordered up a pair based on her new prescription. If this allow her to see and read she may choose to postpone the cataract surgery.
She has been in great spirits the past couple of weeks. Yesterday she went up to Mount St Michaels (Tridendtine) for a concert by 20 singing nuns and had lunch. She called me this afternoon and invited me for their ‘Happy Hour – wine & cheese, but I think I will be too late.
Looking forward to the Lake - Pat
A WEEK'S GONE BY BUT WHAT A WEEK....
Latest anecdote.... Kirsten yesterday stopped by Grandma's in the morning... and Mom let her know that it was good that she was stopping by in the morning because 'she had her own plans for the rest of the day!' Does that not make your chin drop just a few more inches towards the floor? :) They had an excursion scheduled to go up to Mount St. Michaels and listen to the "Singing Nuns." She went on her own... none of us chaperoning her... get out.. She told Pat later in the day that she had a great time and the Nuns sang much better than the Ericksons. (That last part I made up... but I defy anyone to argue that point.)
but speaking about Erickson's singing... Ryan's Surprise 40th Birthday Party for Barb was an unimaginable success. He REALLY did surprise her and those of us fortunate enough to be there had a great time. It was the epitome of a surprise party: 30? of us crouched down in her house as she is meandering around in the front yard showing Jane her gardening prowess... and us all jumping up and screaming 'Surprise" when she FINALLY entered!
This is just a few minutes after the 'Surprise!"
Jolene sharing something obviously very important to Grandma:
Sorry I didn't have too many great pics as I just had my Iphone... but I did manage to snag a video of the Happy Birthday Chorus. (Pleas pardon my rather strident voice which obviously I have to remember is RIGHT NEXT TO THE MICROPHONE when I am recording!)
Here is link to video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aE9LfCVHiLw
Til I blog again....
Stroll and Roll - Wednesday June 30th
As we strolled amongst the flowers and water features the lovely lady featured above serenaded us dressed in her sequined shirt.
The course was packed! Grandma did one of her reincarnations of Grandpa as she prodded me to "hurry up" and "don't hold up the line." We only had to go around the course three times to get a t-shirt and I was in no hurry as I sang to the music.
Here is Grandma picking out a t-shirt. She asked for a Large so that she could give the shirt to her boys.
After we got our t-shirts Grandma wanted to continue going around the course. She kept telling me that we were only on lap 2 and that I was counting 1/3 of a lap as 1. At first I thought there was some dementia kicking in but then I realized that this was her sly way of keeping me going round and round. I think we finished a grand total of 7 or 8 laps. As we went around one corner I saw some young maintenance guys shooting one another with squirt guns. I warned Grandma to watch out for these hooligans. But instead of shooting at us they gave Grandma the gun. She then proceeded to shoot every staff member and plant within her reach! Be careful the next time you visit Grandma - you may get soaked!
Grandma brought her watergun to our BBQ table and kept it safely loaded and on her lap. Her tablemates joked about how we would get lunch first because we were armed. Sure enough the very first three plates of BBQ came to Grandma and her tablemates!
After lunch we went back to her room and tidied everything up. There was a letter from Joshua that she had already read from the day before. I read the letter to her again and she was just delighted. I thought this was a positive sign that even little things like a letter can bring Grandma joy over and over. I wish I would have spent more time during the last seven years getting to know my Grandmother. I am now constantly surprised by the new things I am learning about her personality.
Weekend of June 26, 27
I’m getting a bit behind on keeping up with Grandma… Grant work is increasing and it seems we are so busy. What happened to the ‘lazy, hazy, days of summer???’
Just a couple anecdotes of the last few days:
Saturday morning I went in early and was there before Grandma woke up… it was about 7:00 am. She actually stayed in bed and slept off and on for about a half hour before she was ready to get up. She was a little weak – said so herself and then had a bit of trouble standing as they were helping her with the commode. (She later said that opening up her eyes and seeing my face was too much to handle and it threw everything off for the day. :)) Anyway we decided that rather than me taking her somewhere for breakfast that it would be better to just eat there…. And after eating a good breakfast she was fine. “Her blood level was 110 and it has been around that for a a number of days the nurse said.
Grandma went to church with Pat and I yesterday at our church, St. Joseph’s in Colbert. Everything went fine and we sat up front where they have a ‘niche’ in the pews for a wheelchair. About ¾ of the way through Mass, she leaned over to me and said, “This doesn’t seem like a Catholic Church..” We talked about it afterward and she said it just doesn’t seem like it’s Catholic. We mentioned that we could go to Barb’s church or just some other churches and she let us know that she didn’t think Barb’s church was Catholic either. (It has been TOO long since this lady has been to Mass!) I am including a pic of Mom at church just to confirm we DID go to a Catholic Church! mmm maybe the Lutherans running the Vesper Services at Riverview are starting to convert her?? (Just kidding, Jolene!)
We then spent the rest of the afternoon at our house where Barb and the girls joined us. Kirsten and Dad fixed Grandma's Hamburger Stroganoff and Michaelyn fixed a huckleberry/apple pie. Mom was ready to go back ‘home,’ though, which we feel is pretty healthy. To be honest we were a relatively loud group, as usual, and I think she is getting comfortable with her quiet Riverview ‘apartment.’
Funny story: A couple days ago I was filling out a medical information form that Mom needs to complete for her eye appointment and I was going down the list where it asks if “Yes/No” do you have diabetes, stroke, etc. I got to Neurological Disorder” and she answered, “Crazy as a Loon.” I then got down to Pregnant or Nursing? And she patted her tummy and then said…well, no but I am nursing. I laughed and then she said, “Nursing – You would need a microscope to even see these boobs.” (Seriously – that was verbatim. Where is this funny Grandma coming from??? )
JUNE 24 - RECORD VISIT DAY!
Ali's slide show of Grandpa. Ali brought copies of the Grandpa funeral video that she put together. It was interesting that when Ali brought the copies today Grandma said she wanted to watch it alone the first time. ??? And she still felt that way in the afternoon when I offered to watch it with her. But then Pat somehow convinced her to watch it with him... He prefaced by telling Mom this was probably going to be at least a five Kleenex movie. And it definitely was. Pat said both of them had tears streaming down their cheeks, but they both really enjoyed it. Ali: You did such a great job. She left copies for the Erickson's so if you don't have one yet - they are at Grandma's.
Pics to go with the last Post...
I just can't seem to get the insert pic thing down with Blogspot. I can insert one pic but then the next one mixes everything up! Here is a picture of Mom having Father's Day Dinner at our house. The second picture is of Sonny, one of the resident dogs. When we brought Mom home on Sunday we were just sitting and talking and out of the blue Sonny walks in and just plops himself down by Mom!
SUNDAY, JUNE 20th - FATHER'S DAY
1. When I called to let Riverview that we were going to take her for the day, the staff member who answered, said, “Ann? No way are you going to steal our favorite lady!!” We told Mom that and we think she loved that…
2. She is stronger so the transfers and the bathroom process was much easier this time.
3. We watched the video of pictures of her side of the family…and she really enjoyed that. It was impressive how much she knew. I am going to include two video clips of what she was saying during the video. At one point a house was in the picture and she just spit out the address in 2 seconds. We all laughed… (I accidentally deleted that part of the video. These are just videos taken by my Iphone so they are not great quality and the sound is poor, I know. But... I hope they give you a chance to 'see' Mom.) I think she feels good when she is able to remember so much.
Video Clips -
(This is a short clip where after watching the Kowal video, I asked Mom if she wanted to send a message to everyone. I was thinking she was going to say "Hope everyone is having a nice Father's Day...or something like that...but instead she says: "Well why don't you come visit me? ... Please don't be offended. She really was kidding. I don't remember this totally humorous Mom...but she now makes unbelievable funny remarks on an hourly basis. She is also kind and very appreciative...and occasionally cranky. For those of you who couldn't hear what Grandma said in an earlier video of her with the physical therapist: Everyone was telling her to push up with her hands to stand up... So she said, "Push, Push, Push - you better be careful when you say that to me...I think of the baby's head showing." (This IS a funny Mom!)
Link to: Grandma's Message http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2wys_lHPFP8
Link to: A couple minutes with Grandma http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-NyQfLIkrY
(This is just a couple minutes of Grandma watching and identifying people. I just thought some of you would like to just watch and listen to Grandma for a bit.)
4. About 4:30 Pat asked Mom figuring out what time she might want to go back. (We were a little worried that she might be a little sad about returning….) Instead, her answer was, “Well, I think I should get going back pretty soon.” Those relationships that she is developing at Riverview are important and beginning to pay off. That place is beginning to feel a bit like her home…or home base. We will try and continue to try to make it as homey as possible.
That's all for now... Barb just called and she is spending the morning with Mom...
MOM WALKS 350 FEET!
Of course, when I asked Mom how far she had walked, she said just to her room. She also didn't immediately remember that Pat had been there this morning. Oh well, two steps forward, one step back. But in this case it was 350 steps forward!!! Woohoo
Thu., Fri., June 17-18th
On Friday Pat had coffee with her in the morning because he was able to go to work a little late and I was able to get there just before lunch ended. We went back to the room and played a game of gin rummy with some larger cards that they provided. I am not sure how Mom was really doing. Without her glasses…I think there is some eye strain issues. Pat came by about 2 so I headed out as I am starting back to work on the grants. Pat took her for a walk by the river and then they sat on the swing and swung for almost 45 minutes. Pat helped her to dinner but did not stay. He said Mom was in great spirits the entire time.
Grandma's Glasses or... A Tale of Two Switches
June 14-17, Mon-Thu
Mom continues to seem to thrive. Memory is still an issue, tears on occasion usually related to Jim, but she is increasing strength and in awareness of what is going on. She is now up to walking a hundred feet. A few anecdotes since Sunday.
Monday – Mom complained to the med nurse today that she was awakened at 5… taken to the bathroom, got half dressed, then they put her back to bed. The nurse initial said that sometimes they have lots of people to get up and get going…but that we could make it a ‘rule’ that she not be gotten up before 6. Mom really communicated well. She said something on the order of – well, I understand that things can happen, but you know, I am paying for this and it seems like I should have some say. Tammy the nurse, agreed and also told Mom that yes she has many rights…and she just needs to let us know what would work best. I just thought, “wahoo, Mom… you go girl.” (Barb, Kirsten, Pat and the Cerrillos also visited this day.)
TuesdayWednesday – Michaelyn and I visited and spent some time in the garden… then rolled her into the cafeteria where they were having Morning Coffee/Sittersize. Michaelyn puts her next to the moderator – a staff member who had been gone to Hawaii for 2 weeks. Susie, the staff member, says to Ann, “Did you miss me?” Ann replies, “Oh, I sure did.” Then - not missing a beat, she turns to Michaelyn and in an exaggerated whisper says, “Who is she???” I mean this lady has comic timing that rivals Leno.
Wednesday - Barb spent Tuesday evening with her and didn’t leave til she went to sleep… then got up early and was there Wednesday morning when Mom woke up. This was so special – Mom told me about it this afternoon… Kirsten then cam mid-day and then Jolene joined Pat and myself for the Doctor Conference. We then joined Ann for communion service; Dick and Luke got there just as that was finishing. I think Mom really enjoyed having the Davenport Ericksons there…. Pat and I stayed and had dinner with her and left this evening when she was ready for bed.
Note: Doctor Conference details will be emailed to all and linked to in the sidebar.
Sun, Jun 13th - Posted by Janice
Hello Everyone,
Surprise, surprise! We went to visit Mom yesterday.
She is very different than when she left Calloway. She told us that she doesn't remember much about Calloway. She said that she vaguely remembers the name Wanda. You've probably heard her say I've been talking I don't know why everybody says I wasn't talking.
Well we took a few pictures and other items back to her - her locket with Dad's picture, one of his hankies, a babushka, and a few other items. They brought a few tears but I think they are treasures. She seems to understand a whole lot more. Thanks to God for this miracle and the change of place/meds/whatever.
I asked her about her plates and we decided it would be best not to take them to Riverview. They might just disappear there.
I tried to blog but I couldn't figure it out. I know how to comment on something but I don't know how to post something. So keep blogging bloggers. I'll have to continue emailing.
Love, Janice
Sun/Mon - June 13th/14th Catching Up...and the Cerrillos make a surprise visit!
Monday AM - I was able to be there early - 7:15 as I decided to just go directly from my exercise class without showering. (Whew! You will probably hear about this from Mom.) My memories from this morning:
1. I brought her a McD's sausage McMuffin, McDonald's coffee and I went down and picked up some fresh fruit, and Boost to supplement. Interesting that while we both said McD's coffee is good...she said she thought Riverview coffee was better.
2. I offered to take her for a ride but she said that she thought she would rather just sit and enjoy the sun.
3. She asked me to help her get a daily activity sheet because she wanted to see what was going on. No Bingo - but she wanted to go to Sittersize at 10:45. We were back in the room when the Sittersize lady came in asking if she was going to be there... said that she depended on Ann to help her with the count. Mom went down and I observed for a bit before leaving.
A Reflection: Remember how Mom kind of shunned Charbonneau activities, exercise? I think part of the change of attitude at Riverview is because here she is a star...she can do the exercises better than anyone else (today, anyway..) Maybe at Charbonneau there were some 'younger, stronger' ladies and with her broken hip/arm... it made her feel extra old??? Just a thought. Great that she wants to participate.
Monday PM - Barb visited with Bel & Claire at 2 and while I don't know the order - the Cerrillo's rolled in and Pat was there after work and before church. Kirsten finished off the day by visiting after dinner/before bed. I called Mom and she said she had the best day visitors, she mentioned that Mary had called and Mom said, and I quote, "It just takes a few words to help someone get out of the dumps." Now assuming she didn't mean that she helped Mary out of the dumps... this is a great reminder for all of us to try and give her a quick call.
Granma Renewed
We then took her outside and sat down by the road to watch the river, joggers and bikers stroll by on a beautiful day.
When Pat and Lyn came by she was surprised that Lyn has a new car, even though she has rode in it.
While we were getting her ready to go to Pat's house she showed off her old humor. While the attendant was taking her to the bathroom, she had a loud, wet bowel movement. While we were giving thumbs up in her main room, Mom blurts out "did that get on anyone". We all broke out laughing.
She also told us how much she enjoyed the food here. She also talked about her exercise and therapy program, so it seems she is adapting and participating. Where has this woman been for the last year?
I will continue to visit her regularly as I travel through Spokane.
Sat, Jun 12th Grandma's First REAL Outing...
Today we brought Mom home for a few hours... With Michaelyn's help we were able to transfer her out of the car and get her into the house. Pat would not be able to do it alone nor do I have the strength to be that second person. BUT... it was a great day. When we got to Riverview to pick her up Jimmie and Karen were sitting outside with her... a great surprise. The visit at our house was low-key... The day was so beautiful we had lunch on the porch (pic) and then just watched home movies. We had a great time watching a Shipman Thanksgiving, a 1990 Othello picnic that involved a Auntie Mary-led water balloon war, finished up by a 'grandchildren feeding the lambs' experience.
Kirsten was scheduled to eat dinner with her so it helped with the transition back home. Let's pray that the days stay this good...