Update from Pat on a very snowy evening...

Family,

This morning we awoke to a foot of new snow. I think we have had a little over two feet year to date. Pullman was getting heavier snow today so the Apple Cup may truly be a snow bowl. Lyn and I beginning to wonder whether the weather will curtail our Arizona plans.

We enjoyed a grateful Thanksgiving gathering with all of Lyn's sisters family at the Jones. Dee & Steve were gracious host and all 26 of us sat at one long table. Michaelyn's Key Lime (our AZ limes) pie was a hit as was Sue Pecan nut pie. David made rolls and loafs of especially delicious homemade bread.

Mom does not have much energy. She spends much of the time sleeping in her wheelchair. Thanksgiving morning she got upset and pulled the hair of one of the aides so they gave her a sedative. They said this was the first time she has ever acted that way. Partly because of the weather and her sedated state I made the decision not to take her out for Thanksgiving.

She eats very little. She got mad at me the other day saying "Don't feed me like a baby!" Mom will usually eat a few bites of fruit (peaches, pear, watermelon, cantaloupe) but the last couple of weeks virtually nothing of her entree, vegetables or starch. Yesterday she slept through most of my visit, but I did put my face close to her and said I love you Mom, and she responded "I love you too".

Because she is generally not communicative I have gotten in a routine of scratching her back, washing her face, holding her hands and helping her drink. She can no longer hold a glass by herself. We usually pray for a while, I will read her some scripture and then we just listen to music or some sporting event. They are putting her back in bed more often because she slouches down when she falls a sleep in her wheel chair.

She has had a runny nose for the past three days and has some kind of bronchial issue. She is coughing more often and sounds congested when she tries to talk.

Please call her and leave her some messages, I will replay them repeatedly until I am sure she is cognizant of your call. Continue to remember Mom in all your prayers - even when you are praying for your team to win.

Love to all - Pat

Thurs., Fri., Nov. 18th & 19th

Friday - Pat: Three of the last four days when I got to Riverview she has been in bed asleep but in good spirits when she is awake. Barb came in later and she really lit up when she saw Barb. Before Barb got there I read the Bible as she really doesn't seem to engage with the TV. She still smiles and winks occasionally, she doesn't talk, but she still recognizes us and it is comforting to be there. It reminds me of the countless hours that she must have spent with us - when all we did was smile or cry.

Thursday - Lyn: Pat picked me up at the airport about 1:30 and we stopped by Mom's on the way home. She was in bed asleep when we got there - and looked great as Thursday, you know, is her hair appointment day. She woke up as we were getting situated and I think was surprised to see me. I brought a present for her (a Christmas Sweater...) and when she saw the package she really lit up....but fell asleep with it on her lap. When she woke up a bit later we opened up the outer wrapping...and then she started to open the tissue..but again fell asleep before finishing opening it. When we finally actually 'opened' it though, her face lit up. I think bringing even small little wrapped gifts might be a good thing - maybe it's like that inner child that we return to...(Who am I kidding? We all still like to open presents!) It was so good to see her after so long.

Napping with Mom...Sat, Nov. 13th

From conversations with Pat, Barb and Kirsten: Saturday morning Pat picked up a milkshake for Mom and when he entered Riverview he could hear her crying from down the hallway... a little reminiscent of Callaway. Mom was dressed, but still in bed and sad. The milkshake, and possibly Pat's presence (Pat would say more the milkshake than his presence) helped her break from her crying. Barb and the girls came in later and Pat took the girls around the grounds while Barb stayed with Mom. Barb said she crawled into bed with Mom and just hugged and cuddled. Her sadness subsided a bit and at one point Mom laid her head on Barb's shoulder and fell asleep. Later in the day Kirsten came by for a visit and the first 45 minutes were pretty good but then Mom starting being sad and crying... being agitated. Kirsten says that one of things that helps her get through Mom's anxiety times is that she is so much more active...i.e., walking her self in the chair across the room... almost getting out of the chair once. She says it is better than Mom being listless... and totally non-communicative. That is probably a good strategy - to always look for what we can be thankful for...even when it is challenging.

Mom Looked Great Today in Her Red Sweater...

I pray all is well with all of you. Some anecdotes and thoughts about Mom. Mom can no longer stand on her own which means she needs two people to assist her to transfer. Sadly I can no longer take out to Mass, or even help her to go to the bathroom. While she has been moved to an assist table for meals today in her room she ate 10-12 spoons of pudding by herself, but I was holding the bowl so she did not spill. She has been eating less and one day this past week her blood sugar was 48. I fed her on Wednesday night and was able to get her to eat 8-10 bites, but she seemed disinterested. I mention to one of the staff that it seemed like it took her a long time to chew and swallow her food so they are going to monitor her a little closer and may be pureeing her food. For the past week or two they have been crushing her pills because of her difficulty in swallowing. They advised me that she had not had a bowl movement for a number of days on Monday. They also put a urine catch devise in her toilet as she seems to be drinking less as well.

When I complimented Mom about her sweater today, she said she liked sweaters and she would like to have a new sweater. That may have been the most coherent thought she has expressed in the past month. While she still tries to communicate, I generally cannot discern her thoughts or wants. It seems that increasingly she is not fully in the present and at times she may be hallucinating or experiencing a different reality. Today she thought I was going to take her somewhere - home - and was upset when I told her that since she could no longer stand, I could not longer take her out of Riverview. She then sobbed for the next hour. I put on a CD of Gospel music and she seemed to calm her some.

Mom does not seem to be anxious a lot - just lost. She does respond to simple things, a hug, kiss, back scratch, foot rub and smiles. Mom reminds me of Lyn's Dad, Joe, and his struggle with Alzheimer's.

We are planning to bring Mom out to our place for Thanksgiving, as we will have plenty of help with the Shipman men to get her in and out of the car. Maybe at Christmas we could do the same or perhaps have an Erickson family Christmas gathering at Riverview? Maybe the afternoon of the 22nd -23rd?

I would again encourage everyone to call and leave her some short and upbeat phone messages. We will play them for her. Love Pat